Never give up

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Can I be honest with you? There are days where I feel completely out of it. I mean low down in the dumps. Sometimes, I think about all the things I thought I’d have accomplished by now. I was suppose to be a successful writer, my social media presence was suppose to have sky rocketed, I’d have become a full time entrepreneur, bought a house— blah, blah, blah.

I had dreams—a vision for my life that I’m not seeing now. I can’t lie, I’ve whined and cried about it. Honestly, I sometimes get so heart broken about where I’m at now, that I forgot where I’ve been. It can be hard to look around and fully grasp the extent of actual success because we think success is a brand new car wrapped up in a giant bow.

Not all success can be measured by some huge act, event, or object. A year ago, I had just started a new job almost two months after I left a toxic relationship. I had about $40 to my name around this time last year, which I used to catch the bus with my then two and three year old daughters. I didn’t even know how to drive and I was living at my cousin’s house. Now, I’ve been at my job a year, I got my license, got a car, I have my own place, and I’m working on my second fictional book.

I can’t deny that even though I had an idea of what my life was suppose to be, what I’ve overcome is extremely impressive. Slowly, I’m realizing that my life is coming together but God had to get the important things done first. I just kept pushing, I kept going despite all my hurdles. I know that if I continue to push for more, I’ll get more. I simply can’t give up. In the mist of the storm it’s hard to see let alone imagine the sunshine but it will come again.

I hope that whatever it is you may be facing, you keep going strong. And like always, ((HUGGS & LOVE))

 

The struggle of creating a freelance writing career

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Over two and a half years ago, I decided that I wanted to become a blogger in attempts to take writing more seriously. Initially, I never intended or cared to make money from or through my blogs. At the time, just being able to write something constantly was amazing to me. I got to connect with so many great people and share my life and imagination with them.

What I really wanted to do at that time was get a feel for writing regularly so I could get in the grove of writing my fiction books. I also created a Short story blog in order to get comfortable with creating new worlds and see if my writing sucked so I could give it up if people hated it. 😂 Luckily, no one had any bad things to say and I was creating new short stories every week.

Soon after creating my blogs, I learned that I could make money from my blogs so I got excited. I knew I had to grow my audience for this, so I researched how to grow my audience steadily. Really all I had to do was create content and interact with other bloggers but I just “knew” I could find some magic formula for that somewhere. I began to focus more on the what if’s and ended up neglecting my blogs terribly. Throw a crazy relationship and kids in the mix and soon the idea of having a successful blog was a fantasy.

Through my many hours of researching, I found that I could submit fiction and nonfiction stories to magazines and other blogs and get paid. So once I got my writing mojo back, instead of writing for myself, I began writing solely with the hopes of getting published and paid by larger platforms so they could tell all their readers about my blogs— my dead blogs. I did write on my blogs here and there but kept the good stuff for submitting elsewhere.

I submitted my work constantly. Rejection after rejection came in especially with my personal essays, the very same essays that I initially wrote to share on my personal blog. The tone just wasn’t right—great story though. That’s basically what everyone was saying. I went through stages of grief getting those rejections. I must really suck, went through my mind every time. It’s not like my freelance career didn’t yield me any income BUT every…single…thing I planned on putting on my blog first was getting rejected. I was crushed.

Then it hit me. Where can I get published? How can I submit without the fear of rejection? “Work with what you have”, came to mind. My blog! That’s where it all started. Sharing my story as an aspiring entrepreneur mom was the entire point of my blog. The ups and downs of motherhood and making money outside of a 9-5 was a journey I wanted to go on with my readers. Crazy how the very same place I ran from is the one place where I knew I’d be accepted. Forget the money, I want to be to be loyal to what I intended to be a genuine representation of my life, not some fluff pieces about parenting and pregnancy being a walk in the park surrounded by bunnies and rainbows.

I won’t stop submitting my short stories and fiction writing but every personal piece will only be shared on this blog. I’m sure they won’t always get rejections but I think I rather share my real truth without the possibility of getting published and still get some of my work edited out to appease readers that might not want to read the TRUE realities of other parents. Sorry, I cannot be silenced.

All of this isn’t to say that other writers won’t find success writing about their lives. This is my experience. I don’t want to mold my life in a cookie cutter way because I’m afraid that others will find it to difficult to understand. Life for me has been HARD. As a mother, I’ve been through so many painful things. So, because my readers have been so supportive, I rather share it with all of you with hopes that sharing could help someone in their own life.

Thank you so much for reading and as always ((HUGGS & LOVE))