Encouraging Faith Mental health

It’s okay to not be okay

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Fighting against the stigma

In today’s society, the idea of not being okay means that something is wrong with you. In the age of social media, all people seem to want to see are posts about lavish lifestyles, vacation trips, and food. No one wants to hear the woes of others so if you dare to feel anything but happiness, keep it to yourself.

Talking about your troubles can make other people feel uncomfortable. For some, your stress reminds them of the reality of their own life struggles, and they’ll rather keep that hidden. For some reason, the people in your life and possibly strangers take your not okay-ness personally. Your willingness to express your pain triggers them and you might find yourself in arguments because you’re expected to “get over it.” While the fear of such responses might make you hesitant to speak up, it’s better to talk about what’s hurting you rather than holding it in.

Being a mom doesn’t exclude me from the not okay moments.

As a mom, I’m not excluded from trauma, pain, stress, and feelings of not being okay. I not only have to keep little humans alive, but I have to make sure that I’m raising my kids to be kind and decent people. I’m training them in the way that they should go every single day. There are days where I feel completely defeated. I get overwhelmed because I want to be a good human and a perfect mother but I fail miserably. Life doesn’t take it easy on me because I’m a mother. I’m bombarded with everyday struggles on top of raising a family.

I’ve heard other moms say that they’re not okay and the response they’ve gotten many times has been, “But you’re a mom. You have your kids. What is there to worry about?” EVERYTHING! There’s no time-out button where we can say, “hold on, I have a lot of mommy duties right now. Life can you  give me a minute to deal with them?” That’s not how it works. 

It’s okay to not be okay.

I think about Moses in Numbers 11: 10-15  when he was weary from his responsibilities. He was in charge of a multitude of people and the pressure was becoming too much. Even though he had seen so many miracles performed through him, he found himself ready to give up. He wondered if he was being punished and asked God where was he supposed to get the things the people were requesting of him.

Things seemed so bad to Moses, he asked God to kill him. When we are not okay there is a serious attack on our mental health. Spiritual warfare overtakes our reasoning. Some people have even found themselves like Moses, ready to die. I admire Moses because at that moment he was brave enough to admit to God that he was not okay. He decided not to hold it in. The feeling of rejection or judgment can sometimes hinder us from being able to say when we’re not doing well but we should still speak up, especially if we’ve had thoughts of leaving this earth.

God didn’t condemn Moses for feeling the way he did. In fact, God gave him a solution…help. Help from his peers who were Godly leaders. God is showing us in this situation that it’s okay to not be okay. If Moses could feel so broken after all that he had seen, I doubt God looks at us and expects us to always be okay. Brokeness is something that many people in the Bible experienced and God chose to help them instead of letting them fend for themselves.

If we look at Job, we see he believed God was still with him even through his tribulation. When we are suffering we have to cling to God. We need to stay in his presence. Nehemiah 8:10 says, “Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” When we find ourselves slipping into grief for whatever reason, we need to remember that God is our strength. 

Be encouraged.

Are you struggling to feel okay? Do you feel ashamed because it’s automatically assumed that believers aren’t true believers if they get weary? Do you fear that God will be upset or question your faith in Him? Take a breath! God knew we would have difficulties in life. The Bible contains many scriptures that give us encouragement by telling us to be strong, not to get weary, and to know that God is always with us. God is with you in your not okay moments. He hears you even when words are not enough to describe how you feel.

Seek God and tell Him the way you’re feeling. You can be completely honest. With God, there is no judgment when we choose to be vulnerable. with Him. After all, He knows everything anyway. So on your most not okay day, know that it’s okay because you have a Heavenly Father who cares deeply for you. 

As always, Hugs and Love!