The battle between stay at home moms and working moms.
I believe that most mothers know that there’s some type of unspoken war between moms who stay home with their kids all day and moms who, go out and work. You choose what you want to do depending on what’s best for you and your household. We all have our reasons but some women tend to judge the ones on the other side of the fence.
Selfish! You’re selfish if you leave your child in the care of someone else so you can work. You’re selfish if you don’t get a job to help contribute financially to your child’s upbringing. Take it easy ladies! Even though I’m a SAHM I still try to find work-from-home jobs, not because someone told me to but because I want to. I can understand why both sides make their decisions. I myself wanted both. I can’t judge another mother for doing what she felt she needed to do. If her kids are loved and well-taken cared of, that’s all that matters. MYOB! Lol
Besides being seen as the worse mother in the world, you can also be labled as lazy or a work-aholic that doesn’t love your kids. Listen, once again, different strokes for different folks. Wanting to be at home with your kids doesn’t mean you’re trying to run from working and working doesn’t mean you’re trying to run from your kids. I would love to have a job and make lots of MONEY but that’s not my reality. With two girls, child care would cost more than their monthly expenses in just one week; I’d be working to pay someone to take care of my kids because I’m working to pay them. Get it? Some people can afford that and still have money left over and then some to be able to help pay bills. I mean depending on how low or high your income is you can either get assistance or have enough money to pay for whatever without blinking an eye. It’s all about your life and your needs as a mother and family.
I thought that mothers supported and encouraged each other for the most part. Turns out that just like with any other thing, personal decisions on working or staying home can ruffle a lot of feathers. I was once oblivious to the tension such a topic could create. How can you, not knowing someones background, assume anything based on a mother that works or stays home?
I’d like to hear some thoughts on this. And like always, (Hugs and Love!)
I’m a mother of three. I’ve been writing for six years both for myself and for different companies. I write content about many different topics but mostly about motherhood, faith, and life.
It’s even worse for SAHD as my husband was before his health took a turn. Luckily enough my income is enough with some frugality to pay for childcare while we figure things out for him. But the stigmatism he faces even with known health issues is unreal.
But as far as your topic I hate to hear women bash each other, working mom vs stay at home mom, breast feeding vs formula, we all have the same goal, healthy happy children.
Yes, I agree. None parents already criticize you to hell and back. You’d think a person who knows the struggle would be a great support system not bash you based on such things. It’s an unnecessary argument.
I bet it comes from people thinking the man should make the money and run the house. How is it that men get negative attention for staying home with their kids? They’d still complain if he worked a lot. It’s ridiculous. I wish him the best in regards to his health.
It’s great that you said that “it’s best to do what’s best for your household”. Sometimes it was better for my wife to stay at home at some times it was suitable for her to work. This was especially the case when I was in the Navy.
Some people think life is cookie cutter. When it comes to the family dynamic, one size doesn’t fit all. I dislike when people are so hard on others based on what they deem to be nessecary for a healthy family life. Sometimes what works for one person can’t work for the other, even if they wanted it to. I understand the Navy life. My cousin is in the Navy and I moved with her so I could help out with her daughter. I ended up taking care of 4 other kids whose parents were in the Navy as well. It’s a tough thing.
It is tough and that was wonderful that you helped her out. I salute you for that. Some people are so judgemental.
Thank you! They are but once you know why you made your decision and stand by it, their judgements don’t matter.