I know……I know sounds like a big ole’ contradiction. I promise it’s not. I mean, what could be so hard about having your daily responsibilities all be steps away from bed? EVERYTHING!

When you work outside your home, you get to escape from the day’s stresses once you get inside your house. If you’re and SAHM or a WAHM all your stress is hitting you in the face like a brick and you have nowhere to run. You’re desire to raise your kids without a stranger’s help has it’s own challanges.

Everyone assumes you’re on the couch, eating snacks, and watching your favorite soaps. The reality is you haven’t showered, your hair is a mess, your kids are crying while you try to cook, and you think you broke your hip after slipping on some toy you don’t even remember buying. Making calls is like Russian roulette because everytime you do, your baby decides to test his/her vocals. It’s hard! 

There is no manual nor mother’s guide to raising kids. Yeah, yeah there’s the self help books and all of that but my kids don’t fit into a box. What works for one of my daughters is a complete disaster with the other one. Have you ever tried cleaning with kids running around? It’s like mopping in a flood……completely pointless. Doing the daily chores went from 0 to 100 real quick! Lol! It’s frustrating because you want your house to look like you got your *beep* together. There’s always going to be that Nosey Norma who ask, “How is it being a SAHM.”, and then answers her own question by saying “It has to be so easy; you’re home all day.” Well no Norma! It ain’t. You’re job ends at 5pm, mine is a 24/7 type of gig.

I won’t undermine the working moms. You go girls! I just think that some mommies that work outside the home need to just imagine…..imagine that your kids screaming at the top of their lungs before bed happens about six times a day. Picture that tantrum being thrown after not being able to watch Zootopia for the millionth time as an hourly occurrence. Imagine your daily shower is a luxury and nap time is the only time you get to yourself and it’s spent doing laundry.

Don’t talk about what your spouse might see you as: Baby maker, laundry folder, food cooker, maid, kid watcher, and sex robot. Being a SAHM is seen as nothing to some men. I got “You have nothing to be stressed about” and “You just lie around in bed all day”. I wasn’t on vacation sipping on margaritas; I was frecking taking care of kids all day and night. Could a girl get a back rub? Nope, not if it wasn’t going to lead to him getting sex. I can’t tell you how many times I broke down, not because I was overwhelmed by talking care of my girls, but because I felt like I wasn’t important to my partner. SAHM moms go through that alot, especially if you don’t have a work at home job. Your existence seems to be tied to your kids, as amazing as that is, when your spouse doesn’t recognize you as anything more than a mother. The financial burden of daycare might be lifted but your relationship starts to strain.

If you chose to be a SAHM know that it is so wonderful but also know that it takes so heavy lifting. Mentally you go through so much and as good of a listener your 7 month old is and as great as the advice your 4 year old gives, you will need a friend! Get out, enjoy the sun, make a schedule, and create play dates to hang out with other mommas as your babies run around. Staying at home with your kids is WORK. I mean for goodness sake if it wasn’t there wouldn’t be a career for it. It’s days filled with screams and “I love you(s).”, tantrums and timeless memories, headaches and hugs. I wouldn’t have it any other way because, Being a stay-at-home-mom is the hardest easy-work ever!

Dena Felix

I’m a mother of three. I’ve been writing for six years both for myself and for different companies. I write content about many different topics but mostly about motherhood, faith, and life.

www.wordsfromamother.com